Melbourne bring out the razzle-dazzle football to put away an opponent for the first time in 2024, giving the Bunnies their regular loss in the State of Victoria.
Melbourne – 54 (Coates 10', 28', 33', Papenhuyzen 7', 43', Warbrick 30', Grant 37', Munster 66', Wishart 71', Chan 77' tries; Meaney 7/10 goals)
South Sydney – 20 (Gagai 19', 51', Milne 58', Murray 60' tries; Hawkins 2/4 goals)
Ten Melbourne Storm tries this week, a first half masterclass and some junk time in the second half:
Back in my season preview I wrote this about the South Sydney Rabbitohs:
Souths are harder to read than an AI-written Sports Illustrated article. I can only assume that they will improve, but by the same token a wasted season and missing the finals again are equally possible.
Well after seven matches I think we know how to read Souths. They’re cooked.
After weeks of Melbourne heart-stoppers, this was the match we all needed. Stress free rugby league on a fake Saturday night at AAMI Park.
Starting to come together
The opening exchanges put Melbourne firmly on the front foot. It wasn’t that it was a fast start by any means, but you could see that the Storm players were switched on and wanted to match the occasion.
Souths would only have two tackles inside the Melbourne 20m zone in the first 13 minutes, with Melbourne scoring twice to take a 10–0 lead. The first try set up with some great passing and offloading down the right edge,1 with a little chip from Jahrome Hughes setting up Ryan Papenhuyzen to score. It was great vision from the halfback to spot passive and out of position defence, attacking hard down that right channel. Souths not touching the ball again with Melbourne going back-to-back when a Cameron Munster kick was first spilled by Souths fullback Jye Gray, then a second kick on a zero tackle2 bounced perfectly for Xavier Coates to score again in Coates Corner.3 It was something of another party trick from the winger, timing his run and put down perfectly.
For Souths to finally score it would take the following:
A silly penalty from Trent Loeiro;
A set restart called by Todd Smith against Eli Katoa;
An unfortunate knock-on by Eli Katoa after Souths pushed an offload;
An error from Ryan Papenhuyzen trying to collect a grubber at pace;
A set restart against Josh King;
A knock-on attempting a tackle by Cameron Munster after the referee missed a clear knock-on from Damien Cook;
Another set restart, this time against Trent Loeiro.
In between all that, Melbourne’s smothering and scramble defence on their line for multiple tackles looked solid, especially one particular try-saver from Will Warbrick, but the weight of possession was always going to see Melbourne struggle to stop a try coming should Souths ever get their passing correct. That happened to come via their left flank, where Cody Walker found just enough space to bring in defenders to leave Jacob Gagai unmarked.
Doing the little things
That try did invigorate the visitors, but Melbourne would reassert their dominance as the half wore on. Melbourne more than matched Souths with their defensive attitude, and it would be the discipline and effort areas that saw the Storm power to three tries in a five minute burst.
Melbourne’s wingers might have scored the tries, but those tries all came from the hard work of the middle forwards creating space for Grant, Hughes and Munster to do their creative business against a passive Souths defence.
Of course not everyone agreed with Melbourne’s domination, especially those News Corp types back in The Bad Place:
Meanwhile the eighth man who cannot die on Nine bizarrely:
I want to live in Munster World.
That’s still this planet Joey, and as Billy Slater retorted in commentary “he’s been there too a few times…”
Tomfoolery
Melbourne were rampant approaching half time, even while Coates left the field through injury. A sixth try wasn’t far away, Grant going over himself after sustained pressure on the Souths line, Grant doing the full spin-o-rama to bamboozle the defence. Heading to half time Melbourne looked to be in the groove leading 32–4.
Coming back from the sheds, Melbourne looked to turn on the razzle-dazzle, with more spin moves and offloads the order of the day, field position setting up a short side close to the Bunnies line for Paps to dummy and score in the left corner.
Junk time
Up by 32 points with over 35 minutes to play, this game entered junk time. Melbourne charitably switching off to allow the visitors to score three straight tries in ten minutes. If we learn anything from these ten minutes let it be something most of us already knew:
Melbourne’s right side defence needs work; and
Tyran Wishart is not a winger.
Once Souths got to within 16 points Melbourne decided that was enough, lifting their intensity and effort back to an acceptable level. Line breaks leading to a nice solo try from Munster under the posts to take the lead back out past 20 points.
Melbourne regaining control in the final part of this match adding two more tries through Wishart and Joe Chan. Wishart finishing good work in the middle on the back of another Munster pass, with Chan’s try coming through the boot of Hughes, with the young forward absolutely chuffed to get over the line.4
There was only enough time for stupid things to happen. Katoa and Gray had a coming together, fortunately neither came up hurt; followed by a delay of game challenge, but the stupidest thing was in the final seconds when Taane Milne decided he needed to be suspended5 by cannon balling Munster to get sent to the sin bin to think about his crimes.
Stat offloads
In 23 matches at AAMI Park (22 for Melbourne) Xavier Coates has scored 28 tries, including five hat tricks.6
Joe Chan scored his first NRL try in his fifth appearance. His dad Alex Chan took 16 appearances to score his first try, scoring four tries in 32 appearances for Melbourne (overall scoring six tries in 61 NRL games). Alex has one up on his son so far scoring a double against Souths for Melbourne in 2004.
Harry Grant scored his 25th career try in his 84th appearance (22 tries for Melbourne in 69 appearances). At the same number of games in his career, Cameron Smith had scored 15 tries.
Ryan Papenhuyzen and Cameron Munster both have 55 tries in Melbourne colours.
Melbourne’s winning streak at AAMI Park is now 14 matches.
Post match quotes
Sounded like a content coach this week:
I thought we played really well in the first half — we defended well, we played well with the ball. We took our foot off a little bit, but I thought we finished really strongly.
It was a really good performance, there was plenty of energy, plenty of intent.
I thought [the first half] was Harry’s best for the year.
[on Munster] it was one of the best games he’s played for the club. He was outstanding. I thought his defence was really good tonight. When we needed something to happen, he just seemed to make it happen.
I did enjoy this butchered idiom from Harry Grant:
[on his try] First one! Hopefully it opens a can of worms and there’s more to come.
Was it worth it?
A big crowd for a match played in fine, albeit cool weather. A draw across the way earlier in the day had everyone in a fun mood too. Melbourne’s ANZAC Day ceremony seems to hit the right balance too between sombre reflection and spectacle.
Looking across at the packed suites and corporate areas, there’s no doubt to me that the commercial side should keep up the fight to keep this match in Melbourne for as long as possible.
It will be interesting though to see how the schedule pans out the next three years with ANZAC Day falling across in what will be a long weekend next year and the weekend the following two seasons. I suspect that the Warriors won’t be back on this night at AAMI Park next year, given their grant of shore leave this season back-fired with an upset loss. Provided that Melbourne don’t lose the right to host their only marquee match of the season, I foresee that the schedule might see this happen:
Afternoon: Roosters vs Dragons
6pm AEST: Warriors vs ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
8pm AEST: Storm vs ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Now if I were to make one suggestion, if Melbourne could host say the Red Fish or a team that isn’t an easy sell to get fans through the gate,7 but still favoured by Nine for a Friday night broadcast next year (and Fox League exclusive for the next two), I’m sure that a three year deal could work. Once this fixture returns to weekdays in 2027 then new ideas could be entertained.
9/10
Storm Machine Player of the Year
Cameron Munster got the Spirit of ANZAC Medal as voted on by “the winning coach” and it’s hard to go past that judgment for points this week. Munster scored a try, had four try assists, and along with Jahrome Hughes and Harry Grant was in everything for Melbourne.
Harry Grant possibly had his best game for the season, and it was hard to leave most players out of the points this week.
Special mention to Nelson Asofa-Solomona this week who was credited with six tackle breaks on eight hit ups. That’s a sign that the big man is hitting his straps in the middle of the park. His average play-the-ball speed was speedy too, often setting up the next attacking play.
Round 8 points:
3 – Cameron Munster
2 – Harry Grant
2 – Jahrome Hughes
1 – Ryan Papenhuyzen
1 – Joe Chan
1 – Eliesa Katoa
Leaderboard:
12 – Jahrome Hughes
7 – Xavier Coates
6 – Eliesa Katoa
5 – Ryan Papenhuyzen, Harry Grant
3 – Tui Kamikamica, Cameron Munster
2 – Shawn Blore, Joe Chan
1 – Jonah Pezet, Trent Loiero, Christian Welch, Josh King, Alec MacDonald
Around the grounds
Jersey Flegg Cup U21s — Wests Tigers 28–24 Melbourne Storm
Wests Tigers jumped out to a 24–4 half time lead at Campbelltown, but the Storm were able to score four tries in the second half to close within four points. Matthew Hill scored a double, as the Storm stay 6th despite the defeat.
Queensland Cup — Tweed Heads Seagulls 50–12 Brisbane Tigers
The Seagulls went on a try scoring frenzy at Piggabeen, thrashing the Tigers. Brayden McGrady scoring five tries in a day to remember. Not as many good memories for Storm players Marion Seve, Tristan Powell and Kane Bradley who all featured for the Tigers, with the only joy found in a hat trick for Coby Williamson. Unfortunately it seems Jonah Pezet has done a serious knee injury and will be out for the season.
Queensland Cup — Central Queensland Capras 14–22 Sunshine Coast Falcons
Down 8–4 at half time, the Falcons scored three unanswered tries in the 20 minutes after half time in Rockhampton to take the points. Young Tonumaipea, Grant Anderson, Lazarus Vaalepu, and Jack Howarth all getting valuable playing time.
New South Wales Cup — Wests Magpies 16–28 North Sydney Bears
After falling behind early, the Bears trailed 12–6 at half time, with Dean Ieremia scoring the only try for North Sydney in the first half. Two tries from dummy half; and a blitzing effort from an attacking scrum by Sua Fa’alogo put the Bears well in front by full time. Bronson Garlick topped the tackle count in his fourth game for the season.
Suncorp Super Netball — Sunshine Coast Lightning 56–60 Adelaide Thunderbirds
A heartbreaker for the Lightning losing in overtime to the reigning premiers. The Thunderbirds dominated the first quarter and went to the rooms at half time with a comfortable 31–20 lead, but the Sunshine Coast fought back in the third quarter to get back to within three goals, pushing hard in the last quarter to take the game to overtime.8 Adelaide, after forgetting that the overtime was two five-minute halves, steadied in the second half to take the win. Lightning needing to get their season back on track this week against the Mavericks.
Next up
Round 9 vs Gold Coast Titans – Saturday 4 May, 7:35pm @ CBus Super Stadium
Cameron Munster will bring up NRL game 200 on the Gold Coast, with Christian Welch also celebrating a milestone, bringing up appearance 150. A couple of injury concerns coming out of the win this week, with both Xavier Coates and Nelson Asofa-Solomona with hamstring awareness. Tui Kamikamica is still a week or so away it seems from a return, so there might be a couple of changes this week.
The Gold Coast got their first win of the season against the Warriors earlier on ANZAC Day, alleviating any reason to sack Des Hasler already (they probably should though). So they’ll be coming into this one with a bit more confidence having overtaken Souths on the foot of the NRL ladder.
Preview post published Thursday.
Things you love to see: confidence. The offload from Welch, the passing of Loeiro and Katoa combining with Meaney. More of this please from this side of the field.
Munster might have worked out a cheat code kicking without fear on zero tackles, but a referee will come along soon to spoil this exploit soon enough.
Season ticket holders in that corner, please get crafty and make a sign already.
The joy between Chan and Alec MacDonald made my night.
For just two weeks instead of the lengthy ban this intentional act deserved… good work General Bias.
One of which he scored four tries (S25E07 against the Warriors).
Like Brisbane, Manly or Canterbury.
There was some controversy in the way that the final seconds played out. Watch the replay free on Kayo for the madness.